Posted in lesbian

Wanted: More Lesbians

I’ve decided that I need more lesbian friends in my life.  I have had the pleasure of meeting some awesome lady loving ladies online but I have felt that I’ve been missing something in my life.  It’s kind of like getting married friends when you’re married.  Or finding friends with kids when you’ve had kids.


I’ve been out as being lesbian for about 3 years or so and I’ve been out as bisexual (HA!) for even longer than that.  But I’ve never been a part of the LGBT community since I’ve came out.  I’ve been blessed to have a bisexual best friend.  But for as long as I’ve known her, she’s only been with men.  I think she had once told me that she prefers to have sex with men. (Ew.)

I have a gay male friend.  We’ve been friends for ages and ages!  We grew up next to each other since we were 7 years old. Since Trump was elected, our relationship seems strained. I mentioned on Facebook that I would give Trump a chance – and trust me that horrible man blew through all the chances I could give him in a thousand lifetimes within his first week of his presidency.  I wonder if I were in the community more I would know not to say anything like that.  I was just tired of my friends and family being attacked for voting for Trump – even if I did want to ring their necks.  I still love them all.  And since I’ve said that, it’s been weird.

I need some seasoned lesbians to take me under their wings and show me the ropes, I suppose.  I just feel that I’m missing that feeling of solidarity.  When I go to Pride Fest with my best friend, I just feel so much… well… pride for who we are and who I am.  I don’t want that feeling to go away once I get in my car and start driving home.

But here’s the really big issue.  I’ll have to overcome my introverted ways.  How can I go out and meet new people if I can’t be bothered to leave the house?  Perhaps I should call my best friend and have her go out with me.  She says she’s sick of men and might start dating women again so I’m sure I can coax her into it.


Wish me luck, y’all!


Guilty Pleasure

Currently, my guilty pleasure whilst pmsing is reading bitchy reviews on Goodreads. It may be my lowest pleasure, yet. And a bit frightening as an author – albeit not published yet. But still bookworms can be down right nasty!

Posted in Book Reviews

Book Review: Huntress

Title: Huntress
Written by: A.E. Radley
Pages: 325
Publisher: Heartsome Books

About This Book (as seen on

Amy is stuck in a rut. After graduating, she never left her temporary job at the motorway service station. Daily visits from a mysterious woman are the highlight of her days.

Until one day, when the mystery woman vanishes.

Amy investigates the disappearance and makes a shocking discovery. Suddenly, she’s being framed, and no-nonsense Claudia McAllister is being sent to arrest her.

Will Amy’s unique approach to evading capture prove successful?


This book is different from the Flight Series in that it’s a crime book.  At first, I was a little nervous reading this. Crime stories aren’t really my thing. I gave it a shot because I love what A.E. Radley has put out so far. Luckily, this story did not disappoint.

The story follows Amy – a woman who is brilliant and intelligent but sells herself short by remaining at a dead end job.  The only thing that makes her dull day-to-day worthwhile is the beautiful and exotic Cara. After the woman goes missing, Amy takes upon herself to search for her and chaos ensues.

The book is a funny and -at times – a scary tale about being in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Radley – as always – does a FANTASTIC job with her character development.  I love Amy.  She is adorable with her big mouth.

The only issue I had this book is that it was too short.  I wanted more!  I sure hope there’s a sequel to this.

I highly recommend this book.

Huntress is available for pre-order at


Posted in Honey Bee

One Year Ago Today

Such of flurry of emotions had taken over me the day I landed in Wellington, New Zealand to physically meet the love of my life for the first time. First and foremost, I was scared to meet her. I was afraid there would be no spark after flying halfway around the world.

It was strange how I was feeling. We had talked via Skype and later Duo for almost 2 years. It’s not like I didn’t know what she looked like. I once told my therapist the fear that I had when meeting her for the first time. “Is she not your type?” He would ask me. “No. She’s very much my type.” I would respond.

Why was I so afraid? When I was in a relationship in the past, I would get all excited to come home and ravage my partners. But when I got home, I was like meh and went about my business around the house. Later, a big duh moment came over me. Clearly, it was because I wasn’t attracted to men.

Jumping back to me in the airport in New Zealand. I nervously looked around for her. I had gotten there earlier because I changed to an earlier flight in Aukland. She wasn’t expecting me just yet and I wasn’t able to text her to let her know because there wasn’t any free Wi-Fi at the Aukland airport.

I called her when I could not find her. She asked me where I was standing. I looked up and told her that I was in front of Gandalf riding on a Golden Eagle. She knew exactly where I was. I hung up my phone and looked around again.

There she was. My Honey Bee. Walking towards me. Instantly taking me in her arms and I felt I was home for the first time in my life. This is where I was meant to be. In her arms.

Our Relationship in a Nutshell. Me being silly and her laughing at all my stupid jokes.
Posted in Adulthood


Everything is falling into place these days and I couldn’t be happier.  I’m going to be marrying my best friend next year, I might be starting a new job at work, and I’m starting school next month.

Last week, I received an email from the college that my financial aid suspension had been appealed. I was suspended because I am what they call a professional student.  I didn’t really know what I wanted to do with my life. It only took my 38 years to figure it out.  I was so excited that I have been granted financial aid.  I was worried about financing college.  I didn’t want another student loan.  I was prepared to pay for all of it on my own.

As part of my appeal, I had to speak with my academic advisor and fill out a Probation Contract so that I could be awarded a Pell Grant.  I made an appointment through Richland’s website and I received an email from him almost right away.  He told me that he spoke with one of the ladies in the marketing department wanted to hear my story of moving to New Zealand and also taking classes at Richland.  They thought it was a unique story.

What’s my story? Let me take you back a couple weeks ago. (This is where you imagine squiggly wavy ripples that accompany a flashback.)

I signed up for all my classes and I was all set.  I was so excited about starting my education until I noticed that I would not be able to finish in time for my move next year.  Not to mention I received an email from the Financial Aid department informing me that I was on financial aid suspension because I exceeded 150% of the credits needed for completion of an associate’s degree.

Broken hearted, I called my advisor and told him that I would need to drop all of my classes that I signed up for – two in the summer and five in the fall – because I would be unable to finish in the year time frame.  He told me that he would go ahead and drop me from my classes but that I should take in consideration that I could complete my degree even half way around the world.  I told him that I would think about it.

I spoke to Emma about this and the decision was clear.  I had to go back to school and I wanted to complete my degree at Richland Community College.  I called my advisor again and told him to sign me back up.  I also started to prepare to appeal my financial aid suspension.

(Enter squiggly wavy ripples back to present times.)

I told that story to the marketing lady. And I also got to talk about Emma which always makes me happy.  She said that they are running stories on social media from lots of students about why they chose Richland for their higher education. She found my story to be inspiring because I didn’t have to give up my hopes to graduate because I am moving thousands of miles away.  That’s why my story is unique to her.

I didn’t really find it too unique or fantastic.  I mean, I am very grateful for the opportunity to finish and actually graduate with a degree in a field of work that I love doing.  I’m just an ordinary Midwestern girl making sure my dreams become a reality.

Posted in Book Reviews

Book Review: Leaving Normal – Adventures in Gender

Title: Leaving Normal – Adventures in Gender
Written by: Rae Theodore
Pages: 116
Publisher: Blue Beacon Books by Regal Crest

About This Book (as seen on
Leaving Normal: Adventures in Gender is a literary memoir that takes an unflinching, humorous and sometimes heartbreaking look at living as a masculine-centered woman in a pink/blue, boy-girl, M/F world. It’s a story for anyone who has ever felt different, especially those living in the gender margins without a rulebook.

I won this book… a long time ago.  I meant to write a review… a long time ago.  Sorry, Rae!

This book was a very interesting read!  Being a femme lesbian, this book really opened my eyes to what those who are not gender-conforming go through. This book – for me – was very educational for someone who has came out not too long ago-ish, as well.  I tend to be a little ignorant about my community and memoirs like this help me be more educated and in turn, I can help educate others.

I recommend this to every orientation, identities, and genders.  Thanks for sharing your story, Rae! We need more stories like these.

Buy The Book: Leaving Normal – Adventures in Gender
Check Out Her Blog (it’s pretty fresh):  The Flannel Files